Breaking Cycles: How My Past Poverty Shapes the Way I Parent Today

Parenting is never just about the present—it’s deeply shaped by the past.

Growing up in poverty and experiencing homelessness as a teenager has left lasting imprints on how I raise my children today. Now, with a stable home, a supportive partner, and two kids, I live a life very different from the one I knew. Yet, memories of scarcity often resurface, shaping the way I respond as a parent.

🌱 Past vs. Present

When my 7-year-old asks for something new, I sometimes feel conflicted. Their innocent wants clash with my memories of bare cupboards and unmet needs. The abundance my children enjoy today highlights the contrast between their experiences and my struggles growing up. At times, I wonder if my reactions stem from an old scarcity mindset or my ADHD.

A simple pair of unworn Jordans for my daughter, waiting for her next growth spurt, became a symbol of this contrast. For me, it was more than just shoes—it was proof of how far our family has come.

💬 Parenting with Awareness

I don’t want guilt to shape my parenting. Instead, I focus on empathy, gratitude, and open communication. I share my past with my children not as a burden, but as a lesson—helping them understand privilege, resilience, and community responsibility.

Through conversations about gratitude and acts of giving back, I aim to raise socially aware children who understand both privilege and compassion. My past fuels my parenting, but it doesn’t define it—it guides me toward creating a more mindful and empathetic future for my kids.

Parenting, for me, is not only about teaching—it’s about healing, connecting, and growing alongside my children.